For the last couple of weeks I’ve
been projecting a problem at Priest Draw called Antimatter. I first started
trying Antimatter last April but abandoned it once it got too warm and I began
work at CREC. It’s been cold everywhere for the last couple of weeks. Here in
Flagstaff temperatures didn’t even break freezing until yesterday.
On my first 2013 session on
Antimatter I refined all of my beta, of which there is much. It took me about
two hours to finally make up my mind on the crux section, which involves some
strange pinches, a dropknee/toecam, a cross-under, and a bad gaston. The Draw
is a wonderful place this time of year, if you were wondering. The parking lot
is void of cars and covered in deep snow. Only the true die-hards make it out,
so the whole place glistens with winter solitude. It’s quiet. Only the birds
make noise, and during that cold snap they were elsewhere. Probably Sedona.
Anyway, I climbed at The Beta every other day and once last week headed out to
Antimatter with Danny and Matt. It was snowing and about 20 degrees. As soon as
I booted up my feet lost all feeling and I made absolutely no progress on the
probelm. It was beginning to seem as if Antimatter was impossible for me, that
I’d never see it through to the end and hang from the double toe hooks on the
lip where I finally, after like 15 moves, would get to relax my core.
I
made a point of not thinking about Antimatter for a couple of days and climbed
up on Elden, where I found myself excited on a couple of other projects. I had
to get Antimatter out of the way so I could move on. Climbers are often in a
perpetual state of progression, and the feeling of stagnancy is disheartening. That
was exactly where I was. I felt like the next level was just out of reach. I
was getting frustrated.
Yesterday
I got off from work at four and took advantage of working in a bouldering gym
and warmed up there. I drove quickly out to The Draw and raced the setting sun
to Antimatter. The light was coppery while I set up the pads and camera. Conditions
couldn’t have felt better. I did the crux once to remember the body positioning
and cooled my hands off on a nearby rock. Hot hands and freezing rock equal
condensation like on a cold drink during a hot summer day. I pulled onto
Antimatter and walked it first try of the day. My feet even cut, which was the
issue that had been keeping me from the top, but I held on and summoned energy
I didn’t know I had and was soon topping out. My mouth tasted of metal and no
matter how much I spit, there was more. It took me half an hour to catch my
breath.
Now
though, I feel as if a weight has been lifted. I’m going to Hueco next week and
I know that if I hadn’t done Antimatter it would loom over those desert rocks I
hold so dear like a bulging thunderhead. But it’s not. I will go to Hueco with
a clear mind and I will hopefully come back proud. There is always a feeling of
change, of anticipation, and of fear on top of every project. With growth comes
the great unknown, a place we generally avoid. The road to satisfaction is
limitless and, for me at least, paved in crimps, slopers, pinches and pockets.
Oh, and here is a link to Antimatter.
